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One of the most beautiful things about being human is our ability to experience many firsts as we age. Some of these, such as first wins, first failures, or first loves, leave an unforgettable imprint on our souls. A similar profound first, for those who want to experience it, is becoming a mother. The experience of bringing a new life into the world is uniquely transformative - you’re raw, yet calm. Vulnerable and fragile, yet strong. It is the most difficult thing you’ve ever done, yet it is purported that it’ll all come to you almost effortlessly. 

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An immense amount of time and resources are dedicated to caring for the mother and child through pregnancy and helping parents prepare for this first. However, the same amount of caring, resources, and support is often missing for the postpartum experience. 

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There are cultures around the world that have postpartum traditions focused purely on helping mothers recover and bond with their babies. For example, in India new mothers will usually adhere to a 40 day confinement period where they are supported by family, given special nutrient-dense meals, and assistance with physical recovery. Korea has a similar tradition called Saam-chil-il where the first 21 days are dedicated to the mother and baby’s wellbeing. 

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However, such traditions don’t exist in every culture. They can also be difficult to access if you don’t have family and friends around for support. 

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Avalon Nethery, founder of Borne, experienced the lack of support herself. “We decided to have our first baby during COVID. I had a traumatic birth – I had been in labour for over 38 hours, I hadn’t slept in two nights, and I found myself having a panic attack in the hospital. I was worried about asking for help because I thought my baby would be taken away from me. After I gave birth we were in lockdown and my family lives overseas so I had limited support. When we were leaving the hospital my husband said to me that we should build our own private hospital. From that day I couldn’t stop thinking about the idea and started looking into how I could change the experience for new mothers”, she said.

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Avalon wanted to create a safe space where mothers and partners received the care and attention they needed to truly recover as they started on their journey of parenthood - this is why she created Borne, Australia’s first luxury postpartum hotel. 

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Re-imagining postpartum journeys 

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Avalon had been working in property development for 11 years. Once her husband mentioned the idea of a private hospital for mothers, she started looking into possible sites. At the same time, she was adjusting to a new life as a mother. 

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“I did get postpartum depression and anxiety”, Avalon shares. “Even after everything I knew and working through this challenge, I still got depression at the six-month mark with my second baby. We hear a lot about adolescence and the changes it brings about. ‘Matrescence’ is exactly the same for mothers. Particularly where you put a mother from a background where she is quite driven, likes control, and is a high achiever, into an environment where she has no control, works according to the demands of the baby, and there’s no external motivation or recognition”, Avalon elaborates. 

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Statistics show that this phenomenon is more common than we might realise. 1 in 5 mothers experience depression from pregnancy to their child’s first birthday. Add to this the fact that new mothers have to also navigate unsolicited advice from friends and family, or conflicting advice from different professionals, while they battle sleep deprivation and try to make decisions for their baby – something they’ve never had to do before. It is no surprise, then, that many underestimate how challenging motherhood can be, and feel increasingly isolated and anxious. 

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“If you have a child and you or your partner had postpartum depression or anxiety, your baby is at a three-fold risk of behavioural and developmental issues growing up. Neuroimaging has shown that their brains will develop slower and in a different way to babies with healthy parents. Why? Because when a baby sends cues it usually alerts the mother’s system to respond and bond with the baby. When you have depression or anxiety, you don’t hear those cues and bonding is harder. Further, children and adults who have grown up with a parent who had postpartum depression or anxiety are at a 50% higher chance of getting depression and anxiety as an adult”, Avalon shared. 

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These statistics further spurred Avalon into action, as she realised the far-reaching positive impact she could have by providing mothers and partners with the right care and support at the right time. She decided to build the village that mothers need postpartum through a luxury hotel experience – located at the Intercontinental, Double Bay – that focuses on empowering new mothers. All services are set up to support mothers who’ve given birth themselves, adopted a child, or gone through surrogacy. 

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Elaborating on what Borne offers, she said “We run Monday to Friday and take in cohorts or groups of mothers and their partners. They can bring their babies up to the four month mark, but we are also accommodating having older babies stay with us on special request. You’d check in with us on a Monday and we have full programs, such as mothers groups, acupuncture and breathwork, mental health workshops etc. that run through the week. We have 24/7 expert care rostered on for the entire week including registered midwives with over 40 years of experience, internationally certified lactation consultants, registered Mothercraft nurses, and baby sleep consultants.” 

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Unlike hospital-run hotel programs that last for a few days and where access to services is determined by private health insurance, Borne is a mother-centric care model that is open to all. 

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“Our goal is to deeply understand each mother and help her find her inner wisdom and confidence to make decisions that are right for her and her family. While we lay out facts and suggestions, our goal is to provide a toolbox on how you can go about making those decisions”, Avalon said. 

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Borne’s ultimate mission is to make new mothers feel confident in their own ability and instincts while acting as their “ride-or-die” when they navigate increasingly challenging decision making for themselves and their babies.

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Purpose, determination, and wild dreams

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Avalon had been working on the concept of Borne for over three years before she decided to apply to the Startmate Accelerator program in Winter 2023. She had been encouraged to do so by her friends who were also applying and felt that it would be a space where she could meet like-minded, purpose-driven, ambitious people. 

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“The application process was great because it made me do all the work I needed to put together a business plan. I didn’t get in when I first applied but I kept working on the business every single day. I applied to Startmate the second time this year because I got an email from Holly saying that they had seen my application the last time and thought I should re-apply. I decided to give myself one hour to refresh my last application and see what happense, and it all came together”, Avalon said. 

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Being a part of the Startmate community has helped Avalon grow and find her confidence as a founder. “Sometimes on this journey you think, ‘Am I crazy?’  Sometimes you have a wild dream or goal but you don’t tell other people because they’re going to think it is unachievable or too big. In this environment you can have the wildest dreams and people will support and encourage you”, she said. 

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Through the Accelerator program, Borne has continued to grow. The team consists of six leaders who are helping refine the Borne approach and train the broader team. Borne incorporates practices and traditions from other cultures, such as Indian and Chinese, in the meals and services offered to create a more holistic supportive environment. The team acknowledges that the support one might usually receive from parents or grandparents may not be accessible to all, and this is where they step in.

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“Often it is just listening and saying to women ‘I hear you, I support you, and what you’re feeling is okay and normal’”, Avalon shared. 

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Avalon’s ultimate purpose for Borne goes beyond providing a supportive community. She would love to fund research for mothers. “There haven’t been enough studies on women, we know that’s true across the board including giving birth and postpartum. I think we’ve got an amazing opportunity to talk to mums for weeks at a time, run drop-in clinics, and fund studies that will really shape what we know about mothers’ health and well-being, and their relationship with the baby”, she said. 

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Avalon sees Borne’s hotels being established globally as a flagship service. Beyond that, she’s building an online platform that will make Borne “MasterClass for mothers” and grow with the families it supports. 

“For me this is not just a passion, it's my life’s purpose. It’s important to believe in yourself and go ‘Why shouldn’t it be me who does this?’”, she concluded.